5 Time-saving Holiday Shortcuts

‘Tis the season for out-of-town guests, dinner parties ... and stressed-out women. But the holidays don't have to be the craziest time of the year. To help you breeze through the season, we asked a chef, decorating guru and stress-management expert to share their smartest and simplest tips. Not only will you look like the perfect hostess, but you'll do it all with time to spare.

Decorate in Minutes
Having a dinner party? There's no need to make a trip to the florist or to glue together an elaborate tablescape. All you need for a festive centerpiece is a glass garden cloche, a bell-shaped cover for outdoor plants that's sold in gardening stores, says Jenn Andrlik, holidays and crafts editor for MarthaStewart.com. Turn it upside down and fill it with it ornaments or pinecones from your yard. Then invert a plate over the open end and turn it back over.

If you have leftover [holiday decorations] or you're swapping in new ornaments this year, this is a nice way to still keep the old ones on display," says Andrlik. "You can put any holiday decorations you have laying around in there and make them look beautiful.”

Keep Candles in Storage
Mood lighting is a must at festive events, but candles can burn out early. Instead, swap them for vases or frosted glass cylinders filled with white string lights, suggests Andrlik. Place them on a table near an outlet, and run the cord over the back lip of the vase -- or out the bottom if there's a hole. (Always check the label first to ensure that the lights have been tested for safety.)

Skip Shopping-center Chaos

Overwhelmed by the number of people on your gift list? Save yourself a trip to the mall and give presents that come from your heart -- and your kitchen. Baking may not seem like a timesaver, but if you can take an afternoon to churn out a few dozen cookies, you've got gifts for the whole family, says Colleen Covey, a chef and recipe developer (and new grandma!) in Orlando, Fla. Just divvy them up into pretty containers."We call my husband the "Cookie Man'," says Covey. "He makes 60 dozen in a variety of flavors.”

No time to bake? Buy some premade biscotti."You can dip them in melted white or dark chocolate to make them more festive," says Covey, "then put a few in a clear gift bag and tie them up with a holiday ribbon.”

Jazz up Simple Ingredients
To avoid extra trips to the store, look for ways to get the most out of the staples on hand, says Covey. She swears by herbed butter: a mixture of 2 teaspoons parsley, 1 teaspoon thyme, 1/2 teaspoon rosemary and 1/2 teaspoon sage mixed into 1 stick of softened, unsalted butter.

Covey cuts off half of the butter and rubs it under and on top of the skin of a raw turkey. She rolls up the other half in plastic wrap (twisting the ends to seal it) and puts it in the fridge to harden. Slice it into coins, and use it to make simple dishes seem gourmet."Mix it into gravy, place it on top of mashed potatoes, or melt a little over grilled steak," she says. The butter will keep in the fridge for seven days or in the freezer for two months.

Sneak in Some Silence
Part of what makes the holidays so stressful is that they seem to whiz by," says Kate Hanley, founder of MsMindBody.com and author of The Anywhere, Anytime Chill Guide: 77 Simple Strategies for Serenity. The cleaning, traveling, entertaining and cooking can run together in a blur.

No matter how busy you are, you can create a sense of calm by spending five minutes in silence each day, suggests Hanley. It could be the cup of tea you drink before the kids wake up, or the after-dinner time spent admiring the night sky with the family."Your kids may only last 30 seconds, but you'll be giving them the opportunity to learn how to quiet themselves," she says. "It'll also give you some time to savor the good part of the holidays instead of zooming from one thing to another."

Photo by Arun Kuchibhotla on Unsplash

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The Scent of Happiness

It seems to happen when you least expect it: You pass a woman on the street who's wearing the same perfume your grandmother used, and you're taken back to being 8 years old and watching her put on makeup in her bedroom. Or you enter a bakery and the aroma of freshly made sourdough bread transports you to the kitchen in your childhood home, where your dad is cutting into a loaf.

You already know how certain smells can instantly call up long-forgotten memories, but you may not realize that there's a scientific reason behind the phenomenon. "The part of the brain that processes odors, which is called the olfactory cortex, is located very close to the hippocampus and amygdala -- two areas that are involved in storing emotional memories," says Pamela Dalton, an odor researcher at the Monell Chemical Senses Center in Philadelphia. "So when you breathe in salty ocean air with a hint of sunscreen in it, that whole section of your brain gets kick-started, which helps explain why you immediately flash back to the beach house your family went to every summer when you were younger."

The Scent-Memory Connection
In fact, a Swedish study found that smells unearth earlier memories better than any other type of cue. Researchers exposed elderly people to a word, picture or odor and asked them to identify their earliest memory connected to the prompt. While the word and picture brought up moments from early adulthood, the smell led them to think of a time before they were 10 years old.

And because their power transports you back to the carefree days of childhood, Dalton says scents can be useful for helping you feel less stress or anxiety. "People don't realize how easy it is to change your mood by purposefully smelling something associated with a time in your life when you felt happy," she says." For example, try keeping a little vial of your mom's favorite perfume in your purse or at your desk to take a whiff of when you feel overwhelmed or upset. The effect is instantaneous."

Create Your Own Comfort

How do you get your own children to connect certain scents with happy memories? Dalton says it's easy; you just have to be consistent. "Apply the same lotion every night before you go in your daughter's room to read her a bedtime story or bake an apple cinnamon pie for every special holiday," she says.

In their minds, those smells will quickly become associated with being nurtured or with festive occasions, and they'll always think of you and their childhood fondly when they get a whiff of it, even decades down the road." You can also use a familiar, soothing smell -- like eucalyptus or lavender -- to ease their stress or discomfort when they're sick or uncomfortable. It makes perfect scents!

Photo by CHIRAG K on Unsplash

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Your Holiday Emotional Survival Guide

Between touching family moments and thoughtful gifts, chances are you’re going to reach for the tissue box at least once this holiday season. To help you manage those feelings of joy -- along with the occasional frustration -- it’s helpful to prepare in advance. So before you dive into those decorations and celebrations, consider these four simple ways to make this season even merrier.

1. Give yourself a break. Although it can feel like you don’t have a second to spare, it’s important to take some time for yourself. Even if it’s just for a moment, allow yourself to relax in a quiet place. This will help you feel more in control of your feelings—and prevent meltdowns.

One way to recharge your batteries is through working out. According to a University of Georgia study, regular exercise can increase your energy levels by 20 percent. Plus, it can relieve stress and increase levels of feel-good brain chemicals called endorphins. No time for the gym? Go for a walk, or try our 15-minute at-home routine.

2. Own your emotions. The holidays are full of beautiful moments—like watching your child in the holiday play and opening a handmade gift from a loved one—that can make you well up. A common reaction is feeling embarrassed by those tears. A better way to handle the situation? Be open about your feelings. For instance, say, “I’m so touched by this gift. It means so much to me that it made me cry. Thank you!”

3. Be picky. By now, you’ve probably received invites for events, gatherings and parties from your workplace, child’s school, friends and family. Before you RSVP to them all, consider which ones you really want or need to attend. Focusing on a handful of special events with cut down on stress and help you enjoy every moment.

Rather than give an excuse, decline with a simple “thank you so much, but I’m unable to go” or “I really appreciate the invitation, but I’m trying to scale back on my commitments this year to focus on my family during the holidays.”

4. Create family traditions. By lightening your social calendar, you’ll be able to spend more time doing the things that are important to you. Some of the most fulfilling and memorable moments of the season are family traditions, such making special recipes, caroling with friends and taking in the twinkling lights on a drive. Plan at least one night each week to share to wonder, excitement and joy of the holidays together.

Photo by Roberto Nickson on Unsplash

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6 Tips to Handle Criticism

It’s happened to the best of us: After your boss disapproved of your work, you found yourself fighting back tears (or getting angry). It’s a common reaction. But dealing with negative comments without having to reach for a tissue is important. In fact, learning how to accept -- and learn from -- criticism can strengthen relationships and advance your career. Here are some tips on how to deal with any potentially stinging comment:

1. Breathe. Although you may feel yourself getting upset or defensive, take a deep breath. Feel tears starting to well or your temper starting to rise? Step away from the situation. That gives you time to cool off and gain perspective, so you can respond appropriately.

2. Pinpoint the emotions underneath. Ask yourself: What’s the real reason I’m upset? Is it shock? Fear of failure? Identifying the root of your emotions can help separate your feelings from the situation -- so you can process the comment objectively.

3. Consider who’s giving the criticism. If his or her opinion matters, the comment has more weight. Understanding the other person’s viewpoint can help you evaluate your own behavior. But if the person who made the remark doesn’t matter as much to you -- say, a stranger or random coworker -- realize that allowing their critique to bother you gives them power that they don’t deserve.

4. Decide if the comment is valid. It’s easy to ignore your own shortcomings, and there may be some truth in the criticism -- even if you don’t want to admit it. Try looking at the situation from a third-person perspective: Ask yourself how you would advise a friend to handle the same scenario. But if the criticism is off-base, have a discussion with the other person. It may be a misunderstanding or misinterpretation. Or recognize that everyone is entitled to their own opinion -- and move on.

Giving Criticism Effectively
Along with managing your own response, it’s also important to know how to best deliver criticism. Two tips:

  • Consider how the other person is likely able to handle the situation and how important the issue is to you. In some cases -- say, you’re not a fan of the car your sister recently purchased -- it may be better to hold your tongue.
  • When delivering a critique, choose an appropriate time and place to bring it up (a quiet conference room in the office, or a time when your husband’s not distracted). Focus on the facts instead of getting personal, and offer solutions or propose changes that can help you both get on the same page.

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Moms: Stop Fears Before They Start

It’s part of a mom’s job to watch over her children’s health and wellness. And when kids don’t feel well, we nurture them back to health as best we can.

But have you ever heard your child cough once and wondered if it’s something serious? Sometimes a small concern can quickly escalate into feelings of real fear. If this sounds familiar, there are steps you can take to avoid making yourself sick with worry -- for your sake and your child’s.

“Children are very sensitive to mom’s mood,” says Betsy Cetnarowski, a certified child life specialist at Akron Children’s Hospital in Ohio. “So when mom is anxious, it can make kids anxious as well.”

Check out these strategies for managing fears that come with being the No. 1 caretaker for your child’s health.

1. Talk to your pediatrician. It’s important to arm yourself with information. Instead of putting energy into worrying about what could be going on, call your pediatrician about your child’s symptoms.

“They will either allay your fears or say, ‘That does sound serious. Come in,’” says Los Angeles marriage and family therapist Tiffany Howsam. “It’s OK to ask questions, including where to get more information.”

Just beware of consulting Dr. Google, warns Howsam. If you’re already feeling anxious and you start looking up symptoms, you’re bound to find something to confirm your fears, even if it’s an extremely rare case. “Speak to your doctor instead,” she urges.

2. Stay in the present. Unless you have a crystal ball, you can’t see the future -- and you shouldn’t even try. “When you start thinking about what might happen,” warns Howsam, “you can go into a downward spiral. If your child has a low fever, that doesn’t mean it’s the first sign of an untreatable disease.” Find out the facts from a professional before making any conclusions.

3. Do a reality check. Distinguish the difference between fearful feelings and measurable facts. “Ask yourself, ‘Is this true?’” advises Howsam. “Learn to catch yourself and identify when you’re catastrophizing.”

4. Take a breather. “Find a quiet place to sit for five minutes, relax and focus on your breath as it goes in and out,” says Howsam. If your mind wanders, just bring it back to the breath. Stick with it. You’ll find that you can redirect your thoughts and calm yourself.

5. Make a list. If you notice your nerves getting out of control, you may be dwelling on one negative detail and disqualifying the positive signs of health or recovery. Write down five positive things about your child’s health (e.g., he has a good appetite, his fever is going down, he’s energetic or he’s sleeping better). If you feel yourself heading down that road of negativity, just look at your list for some reassurance,” says Howsam.

6. Be prepared. If your child does need to be tested or treated, find out exactly what’s going to happen, gathering all the details of necessary procedures. “After all,” says Cetnarowski, “the unknown is often scarier than the reality.”

7. Focus on the familiar. One way to comfort yourself is to concentrate on making your child feel more comfortable. “If you are going to a doctor’s office, bring books or toys from home,” says Cetnarowski. “Doing something familiar while you’re waiting will not only help your child, but also help you feel safer.”

Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

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